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Antonio Gates finds peace after tragedy

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Antonio Gates looked into the distance and smiled.

“I said (good bye) a while ago,” he said.

After the first practice of Chargers training camp, less than 24 hours after the death of his 22-year-old sister, Gates paused on his way to his car and talked about being in acceptance, about having made the most of Pamela’s final months.

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Thursday was Gates’ first practice with the Chargers since last season. He left San Diego after the Chargers’ first offseason workout this spring to be home in Detroit with his family.

“You basically get one chance to prove you love your family,” he said. “. . . I probably thought about football one hour out of two months.”

Pamela had suffered from lupus for three years. Her condition deteriorated during last season and then further recently. Gates left after road games separate from the team multiple times last year to spend a couple days in Detroit. He doted on his sister, buying her a new car and then, when it began to snow, buying her a new truck so she could more safely get to her dialysis appointments.

“Anybody, you don’t have to be a football player, no one is immune to the trials and tribulations of life,” Gates said. “. . . You have to deal with it, handle it the best way you can. I will tell you, in my whole 34 years of living, I’ve never done nothing this tough.”

Later, he was silent for a moment before shaking his head and saying, “Everyone goes through it. But I will tell you, it’s more difficult to deal with than hearing people talk about it.”

It’s a harsh transition in many ways to immediately segue way from such gravity to a game, but that is exactly what Gates did Thursday.

A few minutes before revealing off to the side that his sister had passed on Wednesday night, Gates addressed a crowd of reporters and spoke about being back at work and the soreness and readjustment he would endure.

“I feel like a rookie again,” the 34-year-old tight end said.

That was some hyperbole, and Gates smiled wide as he said it.

He has missed time in the offseason before and is practically mind-melded with quarterback Philip Rivers after the 561 in-game completions between them and countless hours of practices and meetings and time talking as they sat in front of their adjoining lockers. Gates’ transition should hardly be noticeable, relatively speaking.

“Him and Phil, I think, could put blindfolds on and go out there and run routes and complete passes,” head coach Mike McCoy said.

While Gates’ reps were limited Thursday, his first reception in a seven-on-seven drill came on the pivot route he and Rivers could have long ago patented.

“The chemistry we’ve built over 10 years kind of picked up where we left off,” Rivers said.

Gates, already the Chargers’ all-time leader in receiving touchdowns with 87, is 392 yards from passing Lance Alworth’s franchise record of 9,584 receiving yards. That’s about a half-season for the man who has averaged 880 yards over the past 10 seasons, leading the Chargers in receptions eight of those years.

He spoke Thursday of what is left for him to accomplish.

“When I think of all the great things we’ve done -- to me the only thing that’s missing is a championship,” Gates said. “ . . . Anything short of that is a failure in this league. I’m not saying (failure) as a team or I failed as an individual, but people don’t remember nothing else but the champions. That’s what I’m looking forward to.”

All that is to come – his 12th NFL season, the quest to win a championship, his likely eventual Hall of Fame induction.

Following these difficult months and before he heads back to Detroit for a few days, Gates was on Thursday mostly just appreciative of the opportunity to practice.

“For the most part, it puts me at ease after all the things I’ve been through from my family’s standpoint and a personal standpoint,” he said. “This is where I’m comfortable at, doing the things I’m accustomed to doing, playing football. It takes a lot of off your mind.”

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