Padres GM Preller daring to be great

The Padres are the talk, the buzz, the sizzle of the baseball world. The Padres. They’re blowing us up with Christmas gifts at such a pace we don’t know what to unwrap first.

Black Thursday was the most remarkable 24 hours of wheeling and dealing in franchise history — in many franchises’ histories. Even ESPN is forced to turn its uppity nose west.

I’m in a drunk’s bedroom. It’s spinning around me. I love what the Padres are doing — even if I don’t know, exactly, what the Padres are doing.

But that’s all right, because what they usually do is fire hitting coaches, audition PA announcers, rearrange Petco National Park’s fences and name a ballpark plaza after a lame duck commissioner who canceled a World Series and will get $6 million per in retirement.

Dizzying. I’m going to take a baseball-sized Dramamine and think it out.

New/young/relentless San Diego General Manager A.J. Preller is moving with such great velocity and, well, voracity, I fear what I’m writing will be moot by the time it hits the streets. But, we’re not asking him to slow down.

A.J.’s snowballing. He’s gone on a treasure hunt and discovered where the Padres’ money has been buried over the years. And, best thing, his bosses are allowing him to spend it.

Is he spending it wisely? I believe so. Can’t say for sure. Who cares? This is exciting. The hot stove, always an ice box here in December, is a bonfire.

He’s A.J. Peddler. This is “Stripes” revisited. “A.J., you are a madman. I want to party with you, cowboy.”

In a matter of hours Thursday Preller did a total makeover of a baseball team he just met. And it’s hard to say he didn’t kick some butt. And he isn’t done.

After it was reported Matt Kemp has arthritic hips, Preller consummated the trade for the Dodgers’ talented outfielder, anyway, the feeling being whatever’s wrong with Kemp won’t affect his ballplaying for years.

Preller acquired outfielder Wil Myers from Tampa Bay. Myers was the 2013 American League Rookie of the Year.

Then A.J. turned north and grabbed All-Star catcher Derek Norris from Oakland.

He also re-signed Tommy John-surgeried Josh Johnson for what could be a song. Not much downside, especially if Johnson can return close to form.

Friday morning, came the big news, that the GM had finished a deal with Atlanta that will send powerful outfielder Justin Upton (29 homers, 102 RBI in 2013) to the Padres.

Then late Friday night came word of a deal to acquire Boston third baseman Will Middlebrooks had been completed.

Preller had to trade some kids, especially young arms, but the Padres have stockpiled them. Amazingly, he didn’t have to deal one starting pitcher.

What the Padres haven’t added here is defense, but there’s a significant power incursion, an influx of wood to what was the most anemic batting order of my lifetime.

The Padres hit 109 home runs in 2014. Upton and Kemp hit 54 between them last season.

How will they fare in Petco? Remains to be seen. But it will be fun to watch players with more than infield fly rule power.

Look, the Padres haven’t been awful, and manager Bud Black did a remarkable job getting 77 wins out of his 2014 bunch. But what they’ve been far outstrips wins and losses. They’ve been boring — incredibly dull, even to purists, who can only stand so many 2-1 games.

The Padres’ hitting problems were beyond a lack of power. It’s been bat on the ball. When you don’t have strength, you must find other ways to score runs, and this team simply has been awful at it. It may be hard to hit the ball out of Petco, but there’s enough room in that place for base hits.

Just hit the damn ball.

So what now? A lot of outfielders here. Too many. What of always-injured Carlos Quentin? Can he be dealt, perhaps to become a DH? Can’t see him remaining. Cameron Maybin either.

Tin men, out.

Upton gets $14.5 million next year and then becomes a free agent. He looks like a rental. But that’s all right.

Can it work? Can it be worse?

You must dare to be great. A.J. is daring.

Kemp calls the GM a “rock star.” What he is now, is Santa. What else will The Peddler pull from his bag?

Mr. Claus isn’t exhausted. He still has chimneys to come down.